Goals
by SSSRHA
Summary: Everyone has goals. Everyone has dreams. Team 7 does, too. But Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto know that having goals doesn't mean that they're good...or possible. Each chapter is centered around a different member of Team 7. [Discontinued]
1. Sakura

Sakura twirled some of her hair in front of her mirror. It was so long. She didn't like it. She _hated_ long hair. It always got in the way of everything. But...Sasuke liked it. That's what Ami had said back in their Academy class, anyway. Though Sakura really doubted it, she was desperate. She would do ANYTHING to win Sasuke's favor. Why?

Because, Sakura had nothing but her looks going for her. She was from a nameless civilian family, she wasn't rich, and she wasn't a talented ninja. Though she would never admit it, she had only barely made the spot of top kunoichi in class. Really, it should have been Ino that had gotten that honor. Ino had a natural talent that Sakura didn't. Sakura pulled many all-nighters to understand everything that was taught. Nevermind the bags under her eyes, that could be covered with some foundation.

Sakura also wouldn't admit how disgusted with herself she was that she couldn't win taijutsu fight with anyone, except maybe Naruto, for her life. True, the Academy's style was not exactly the best and many students learned from their clan, but then there were the civilian kids in her class that had been better than her at taijutsu. They had no clan to teach them better techniques. She could never understand how they advanced so much. Until she found out that their parents had got them personal tutors to work with. That had truly ticked Sakura off. It was also then that she realized that every other civilian kid, other than Naruto (though she didn't know if he counted, for he was an orphan and she acknowledged the fact that many orphans were the result of shinobi missions gone wrong), was filthy rich. They could afford tutors. When Sakura had personally looked into the whole tutor thing, she had balked at how much even the cheapest tutor cost.

So, here Sakura was. She had barely made the spot of top kunoichi, barely passed the Genin Exam (she had pulled two all-nighters for that), and barely passed the Genin Test.

She still regretted the fact that she did little more than get caught in a genjutsu and follow Sasuke's lead in giving Naruto some food.

For a second, as Sakura stared at the mirror, she lost control. She grabbed a kunai that she kept on a dresser and put it to her hair, about to chop it all off. Then, she stopped. What was she doing? She had already messed with her hair enough, it would take forever to get it back to the way it was. The way Sasuke supposedly liked it. Before she could question herself as to why she did this for Sasuke, she grabbed her hairbrush and started brushing her hair.

She didn't want to think about how her obsession with Sasuke was probably just a shallow crush she had had. She didn't want to think about how she'd long ago outgrown that crush. She didn't want to think about how she actually kind of hated Sasuke, or at least what he had become.

Because then she would have to acknowledge that she entered the Academy for no reason. Sasuke had always been her dream and goal, nothing more, nothing less. If she didn't like Sasuke...then everything had been for nothing. Those sleepless nights, those hours slaving away at trying to get enough chakra to mold, those cuts, those scrapes, those broken bones. She had taken it all looking directly at her one goal: Sasuke Uchiha.

Sakura refused to admit that, for a long time now, ever since Sasuke's sudden change of behaviour after the Uchiha Massacre, she had been looking at nothing but open air. She had been looking at a hope, a dream, a goal, that had long since vanished. That didn't exist.

Sakura glanced at her clock, then winced. Oh. She was three hours late. She had been monologing to herself the whole time.

Sighing, she put down her hairbrush, gathered her kunai and shuriken, smoothed out her dress, and straightened her headband. She should really get going. Nevermind breakfast, Sasuke liked skinny girls anyway. For a second, Sakura's bottom lip trembled before she suddenly smiled a small, sad smile.

Of course he did.


	2. Sasuke

When Sasuke woke up at 4:30 A.M., he got up and went straight to the shower. He knew that he wouldn't be able to get back to sleep, just like every night.

Sleep wasn't something that he counted on. He always set an alarm and went to sleep early, in case he would be able to get a good night's rest.

As if.

If there was one thing that Sasuke could count on in his life, it was that the world would constantly be against every stride he took.

He wanted to be his father's favorite.

" _Itachi, my boy, you are the pride and joy of our clan." Sasuke, who had been eavesdropping from the other side of the door, silently ran to his room, his eyes watering, a note from his teacher about his excellent skills crumpling in his hand._

He wanted to be with his brother.

" _Sorry Sasuke, maybe next time." Sasuke stared blankly at his brother's back as he walked out of the house._

Now, he wanted to get stronger.

 _But how can I get stronger if I can't even sleep?_

He climbed out of the shower and stared at himself in the mirror. His skin was pale like his late-mother's, a sharp contrast with the dark bags under his eyes.

Sighing, he squeezed some foundation into his hand. It was his saving grace, courtesy of his mother who had had the same skin tone as him. He didn't want to talk answer any awkward questions about whether or not he was alright.

He didn't want to talk about how he _wasn't_ alright.

 _Idiot,_ some part of him hissed as he covered up his bags, _you need to get_ _ **help**_ _. You haven't had a good night's sleep in five years!_

But Sasuke didn't need help. He was fine ( _no you're not_ ). After all, they were just a few nightmares ( _you can't sleep even sleep anymore_ ). Insomnia was a small price to pay ( _what's the point when you're not even paying for anything?_ ). Sasuke liked to think that every bad thing that happened to him was just a small form of payment, a little penny on the stack that would eventually add up to one great big good thing ( _you just don't want to confront your problems_ ).

Sasuke hoped that the great big good thing was when he finally killed Itachi ( _you're delusional. Itachi will always be better than you._ _ **Big Brother will always be better than us**_ ).

Sasuke grimaced. He walked out of the bathroom, forgetting to match his face with his neck, and got back into the bed, curling in on himself.

 _ **You need to tell someone.**_

No he didn't.

 _ **You're killing us.**_

He was fine.

 _ **Your dream is killing us.**_

His dream was his only goal in life.

 _ **Your goal is only going to ensure our death.**_

He would achieve his goal.

 _ **How? Our Clan was one of the most powerful in Konoha. If they died in one night by Big Brother's hand, how do you think that you'll stand a chance?**_

He would train.

 _ **You're training yourself to the bone. There's only so far we can go.**_

It's not far enough to beat Itachi.

 _ **You're not strong enough to kill Big Brother. We're going to end up dead.**_

 **I want to live.**

 _ **We want to live.**_

 _You want to live._

He wanted to live.

 _ **LIVE!**_

And then Sasuke wanted to cry.

He wanted to cry because the voice in his head was so loud...and so _right_. He wanted to cry because he was so, _so_ tired, and he couldn't even sleep. He wanted to cry because he didn't want to kill Itachi, _**we don't want to kill Big Brother**_ , but he felt like he was backed into a corner.

He wanted to cry because he knew that he would never survive a meeting with Itachi, but he couldn't stop himself from trying.

 _ **Even if you know that you'll get us killed?**_

Even if he knew that it would get him killed.

 _ **Then you deserve what you got and you'll deserve what you'll get.**_

No one deserves anything like this.

 _ **Then why did it happen to us?**_

Because the Universe was a horrible place.

 _ **So you're going to leave it?**_

He was going to achieve his dream.

 _ **Even if you live, you'll still be dead.**_

Sasuke couldn't take it anymore. He let out a strangled scream.

He felted to heavy and _trapped._ He ran to the bathroom and washed his face, not even glancing at the mirror.

When he came back to his room, he looked at the clock.

He was three hours late.

Cursing, he grabbed his weapons pouch and a tomato and ran out of the house.

 _ **You're running away from our problems now?**_

Sasuke didn't answer the ghost in his head. And he definitely was not going to accept that the ghost was Sasuke himself.


End file.
